Complete Private Sesangeul Gajyeoboni Eottae

[Lune]

The sun was already long gone, replaced by the clear dark sky of Hawaii

full of glimmering stars. The moon was shining quite brightly tonight, and there was one woman, unable to sleep currently sitting on a bench in the backyard of the quiet rented house.

Guitar resting on her lap, the idol started to slowly pick on the strings, stringing melodies around finding her muse before finally settling on a song.

"The moon seems beautiful today."

And as she began to play a graceful tune, Dayeon softly sang.

Spoiler: Song

Hurry up young blood the moon is getting full
Holding onto a dandelion
Love floats around the night dizzily
Fly away and softly come true

Feeling like floating up
Through the tense darkness
We won't be afraid
Though I may stumble in this gigantic weightlessness

Over our youthful selves
A big strawberry moon One scoop
Will you let me care for you eh-oh

Up across the wind
Flying high feels so cool
How could life be more perfect ooh​

The Hawaii vacation was certainly what she needed to escape from all of the problems accumulated over the past months. Be it with her job, her friends, and her own feelings. But there was still something inside, and the idol still debated if being around them was the best course of action.

Maybe she should just be alone, like right now.

The wind blows, and the sweet melody was unheard by no one but herself, or at least that's what she thought before hearing steps from behind. Stopping the song to greet the night wanderer, the songstress asked without turning back. "Can't sleep?"

@Yugam

 

[Yugam]

The sole male in the house stepped quietly down the stairs, his usual night time restlessness even more severe tonight than usual. Most of the time he could at least drift off to sleep, even if it wasn't exactly restful. Tonight, however, that was not the case, and the man had lost track of the time he'd spent staring at the ceiling as he waited for the blissful release of sleep.

He crept to the kitchen, having decided he was thirsty, and some water sounded good at the moment. Light illuminated the darkened space as he opened up the fridge, grabbing a bottle of water and opening it, the plastic crackling in his hands as he did so. As he brought the bottle up to his lips, the man's ears began to pick up the sound of a guitar's strumming, and a familiar voice singing softly.

After closing the bottle again, the man walked over to the open glass door leading to the backyard. A raccoon haired woman sat on the bench, singing, playing her instrument, seemingly not noticing Ari's presence, at least until she stopped and addressed him.

"Can't sleep?"
"Mm," Ari grunted an affirmative as he walked closer. "You too, huh?" The man lowered himself into the space beside the idol, sinking into the bench's cushion. "I recognize that song," he said, "IU?"

@Lune

 

[Lune]

"I recognize that song, IU?"

The person revealed himself as Ari, which was even weirder because he was the one in a dire need of sleep. Dayeon did offer him her pills before, but he might not want to deal with the headaches.

"Looks like we have a man of culture here," she jested as he sat beside her, "Mhm, she's my idol."

The songstress then resumed playing the melody on the acoustic guitar, but not singing. The calm of the night was a perfect time to just listen along to beautiful tunes, so instead she conversed with the man. "There's a lot of things in my mind," she explained the reasons why she couldn't sleep, "After all the things that happened recently... I don't think I deserved this moment of happiness..."

The woman paused for a while. "... No, even way before that."

Her hand played with the strands of her hair for a while, as if looking for ideas, or collecting her thoughts.

You're not going to tell him?

She discreetly gulped, stopping the guitar picking. Freya really had to remind her of that, huh?

The idol then played another song. The opening has a very sweet, but sad tone to it.

"So... how's between you and Val?' There's an apparent nervousness in her voice.

@Yugam

 

[Yugam]

Ari chuckled lightly at Dayeon's joke, his head tilting back and resting against the top of the bench back. "I always liked her. Probably one of the first K-Pop artists I really got into," the man said, relating to Dayeon's love of the idol, although most likely in a different way.

The woman began to resume her strumming, and the man listened silently to the strumming of the guitar strings, letting himself be taken away by the soft melody. "There's a lot of things in my mind," Dayeon began to say as she played the guitar. "After all the things that happened recently... I don't think I deserved this moment of happiness..." Ari didn't give any indication that he'd heard the woman. With his eyes closed, the man looked like he might've fallen asleep. "... No, even way before that."

"I dunno about that," Ari finally said after a moment of quiet. "You're kind, work hard, put others before yourself," Ari said through the darkness of closed eyes. "Ask me, you deserve it more than most of the people that actually have it." The world was unfair that way. "But that's just my two cents."

For a moment, silence returned, the strumming of the guitar stopped, and the two sat there in the night with nothing but each other's presence. The breeze rustled the palm leaves high above their head, and the not-too-far-off waves could be heard crashing against the Hawaiian shores. It was a nice night.

"So... how's between you and Val?" Dayeon said, breaking the silence with a faltering voice. "Good. I think," Ari replied. "We talked. We decided we should take things slow, and see what happens. No point in pretending we don't have feelings for each other anymore." Only time would tell where things took them, but at the very least, Ari wouldn't fight against it anymore. "Looks like you two patched things up?"

@Lune

 

[Lune]

"You're kind, work hard, put others before yourself," The man disagreed with her opinion, to her surprise of the idol, "Ask me, you deserve it more than most of the people that actually have it."

"You gave me too much credit." The woman deflected, sighing while looking at the night sky. "I'm just doing what a human should."

"We talked. We decided we should take things slow, and see what happens. No point in pretending we don't have feelings for each other anymore."

"Good." The idol smiled bitterly before a certain internal voice quickly berated her.

Good, my arse.

Why, though? Wasn't this what she wanted, them finally getting together? Now that the pair finally took another step toward that goal, why were her feet currently shaking?

"Looks like you two patched things up?"

She closed her eyes, feeling the cool breeze around her as she tried hard to put her feelings into words.

"I thought so, but there's still a complication..."

The revelation might have left the male dumbfounded, but the nervous Dayeon instead looked away from him. Her hands fumbled, trying to search for a particular chord before playing the opening to another song she knew. Only then she finally continued.

"...You're the added complication..."

@Yugam

 

[Yugam]

"You gave me too much credit," Dayeon said, "I'm just doing what a human should."
"Yeah, well, human's are far and few between in this world," the man said, his words dripping with a sudden venom. A slight frown settled on the man's face, almost a snarl. If it didn't seem like he was trying to sleep, it might've looked like he was bristling with anger instead.

Flashes of dreams, memories, played in Ari's head like an old film strip. For a little while he'd forgotten how evil people could be to each other. He always knew, but it hadn't been until he'd been reminded that he really understood. 'People' were shit. Sub-human. But that was the way of the world, and there was nothing Aristotle Roussos, some kid from Philly, could ever hope to do about it, no matter how lucky, or how much money he got. Things like that would never change.

After Ari had answered Dayeon's question about how he and Valeria had been doing, Dayeon seemed to pause for just a moment. "I thought so, but there's still a complication..." The statement finally had Ari open his eyes and look at Dayeon with a questioning look on her face. A new tune began to reverberate from the guitar. "...You're the added complication..."

"...C-come again?"

@Lune

 

[Lune]

"...C-come again?"

She expected that response, yet, here she was, gulping and unable to look him in the eyes. At least until the song was finished, Dayeon kept her eyes closed, gathering all of her courage to face the man. Her lips trembled, and with every word she uttered, you could feel the hesitation.

"I'm just no one in your and Val's love story..." Just a speck of space dust, no one important. "... I know it's stupid to expect even anything, but..."

Being truthful to your own feelings is not stupid, Dayeon. You're strong.

The idol placed the guitar to the side, leaning on the bench. Her hands gripped her shorts really hard, and tears began to fall on her thighs. Was it just her, or was the night wind getting colder now?

"... I would forever regret it if I don't say this, right here and now."

Spoiler: Say Yes

"Aristotle Roussos," The woman said, almost shouting as if she was going to declare something. Finally turning to him, her teary eyes finally met his as the words she held for so long finally escaped her red lips.

"I like you."

@Yugam

 

[Yugam]

Again, Dayeon did not respond immediately. She kept playing her song, leaving Ari in a state of confusion, but the man didn't interrupt her. The look on her face, closed eyes, the small quiver of her lip. It didn't take much to figure out that the woman was struggling with something. A tiny seed of dread planted itself in Ari's chest, each strum of Dayeon's guitar making it pulse and grow.

"I'm just no one in your and Val's love story..." Dayeon finally began to say. "...I know it's stupid to expect even anything, but..." Dayeon set her guitar to the side, hands moving to her lap and bunching the fabric of her shorts, tiny dark spots forming on them as she seemed to struggle with the words that followed them. "... I would forever regret it if I don't say this, right here and now."
'Oh, fuck, no.'
"Aristotle Roussos."
'Don't say what I think you're about to say. Don't fuckin' do it.'

"I like you."

'Shit.'

Ari's mouth opened slightly, as if he were about to say something, before it snapped shut. Ari sank into the bench, and exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair as his gaze found a bright start in the sky. "Fuck," was the first thing that came out of Ari's mouth as he processed what Dayeon had just said. The man groaned uncomfortably, leaning forward slightly, a hand covering his mouth as he pondered how to respond. If he even could formulate a proper one in light of Dayeon's confession.

"Dayeon," the man turned in his seat to face the woman properly. "I...fuck, I'm sorry." Great start, Ari. "Look, I think you know what I'm going to say." The man reached out hesitantly, grabbing one of the woman's hands. "I care about you. I do, really." He squeezed her hand softly, wanting the woman to know that he meant it. "Just...not in the way you want." If there was a better way to convey any of this, Ari didn't know it. "Val and I," the words soured as they formed in Ari's mouth. "We've got a good thing goin'. I already fucked that up once, I can't do that to her again."

"Besides," the man said trying to put on a soft smile and put a little bit of a humorous spin on everything, even though he knew it wouldn't help. "I'm really not that great of a guy. You can do better than me. You will do better."

@Lune

 

[Lune]

"Dayeon," he turned to her, face to face. "I...fuck, I'm sorry."

The idol already knew where this was going. From the very start. Back from the Summerfest.

"Look, I think you know what I'm going to say."

She did. So why she still decided to go on with this? There was no timeline where Dayeon and Ari got together happily forever and after anyway. Parallel stars, never destined to cross even once.

"We've got a good thing goin'. I already fucked that up once, I can't do that to her again."

She did, too. Put her friendship with the girl at risk, and now she did again. For a feeling that she couldn't hold back. What an idiot.

"Besides, I'm really not that great of a guy. You can do better than me. You will do better."

Spoiler: Galaxy

Tears ran down her cheeks, as she tried to respond to him, sniffling between almost every word. The woman is fighting against reality, no matter how much she pushed on, the answer would still be the same. Yet, she insisted, with a small smile that she forced on her reddened face.

"But I don't want a great guy. I don't want to do better."

She just wanted him.

Both of her hands went to hold his tightly, scared to let go. Gripping his palm like an afraid child, the thought of loneliness was haunting her.

"Guess I am indeed the dumb bitch, aren't I? To even think in the slightest that I have any chance."

"In the end, I'm just—" Her whole body was trembling, realizing the truth of what Dayeon Song was "—a selfish, relationship breaker." The woman broke down sobbing.

@Yugam

 

[Yugam]

The tears began to flow freely down Dayeon's face, choking her words before she could even sound them out. The man grit his teeth, a painful tension forming in his jaw as he watched, unable to do anything for the woman. Worse than that, he was the cause of her pain, something that the man detested. It was always difficult watching people you cared about hurt, but it was always worse knowing that you were the one responsible.

"But I don't want a great guy, I don't want to do better." the woman finally managed to choke out. Ari grimaced. "No, you do," the man said as he felt her hands squeeze his desperately. "You don't know it, but you do." She already knew he was using her in-game. But if she only knew to what ends. Selfish desires. She wouldn't feel the way she did now.

The man's free arm wrapped around the woman's shoulder, her body shaking. "In the end, I'm just a selfish, relationship breaker."
"No," Ari shook his head. "You're just...human." Someone with feelings, wants, desires. Ari couldn't blame Dayeon, nor could he blame her for taking her shot before it passed her by. Maybe he would've done the same thing if he were in her shoes. "You'll find someone. The right one," the man said quietly.

@Lune

 

[Lune]

"No, you do. You don't know it, but you do." He was pushing her away, just like what he did in the game. A great guy or not, does it even matter? She just wanted to be with the person she cared about. Dayeon did not reply, the woman just sniffled, her hands still unable to let go.

"You're just...human."

She's a human. It's not a sin to love. It's not wrong to want something.

But it's evil to try and steal someone from your own friend. How can she face Val now? The woman continued to sob uncontrollably.

"You'll find someone. The right one," the man finally said, his arm around her shoulder to calm the woman down. Dayeon finally nodded slowly, looking at Ari. "I... understand." She might have not made peace with herself, but at least she was trying to. "It's for the sake of everyone. For me, for you, and for Val."

Spoiler: Last Goodbye

In an attempt to calm herself, she tried to take a deep breath. "Can we... stay like this... just for a few minutes?" Around his warm embrace, maybe for the last time ever. "... It's my last selfish request." She pleaded.

Hold her. At least until it stops raining down here.

@Yugam

 

[Yugam]

Dayeon's shoulders shook beneath Ari's arm as he held close, gently rubbing her shoulder as she sobbed, wetting his shirt with her tears. What else could he say to her? There was nothing in the world that could make the kind of pain Dayeon was experiencing any easier.

In another universe, maybe things would have ended differently for Dayeon. Maybe she would have met Ari first, and they'd have had clicked in an inexplicable way. Spent the week in each other's company, Dayeon on stage with the man standing backstage watching her with a smile on his face. Maybe things would have turned out differently.

But this was not some other universe. This was the one where he met Val, spent his week with her. The one where they found each other in Terrasphere and found out they couldn't let go of what they felt. This was the universe where Dayeon lost to Valeria.

"I... understand," Dayeon's words finally managed to choke out, breathing deeply to steady herself. "Can we... stay like this... just for a few minutes?" she asked. "...It's my last selfish request." Ari inhaled deeply, slowly, before he nodded his head softly. "Yeah. We can stay like this for a while." In the distance, the waves crashed against the shore, and the palm fronds rustled in the wind.

@Lune