Amy was having her hair brushed.
She was sitting down inside the tent, feeling both pleased by the feeling, and a bit annoyed at the fact she was once again being taken care of after she finished bathing... She really wished her family allowed her a little more independence.
Nonetheless, that was the current state of things. There was nothing she could do about it other than sigh.
"Something on your mind?" Amy heard the very familiar voice coming from right behind her.
"Nothing much... Just the same as always, mother." There was no point in trying to complain about it. She knew her mother-in-law was not going to give in.
Besides... They were almost done by now anyways.
"Same as always... So you're thinking about how lucky you are to have a lovely mom taking care of you like this!?" She started tickling Amy
"M-mother!?" Amy started struggling under the attack, but it was no use, "W-what's up with that...? I'm not a kid..."
The tickling stopped, "To me you very much feel like a kid." There was warmth in her voice. It was obvious that she was smiling, even to a blind person.
Amy's mood just plummeted as she heard that though, "... This is the kind of thing you should reserve to your actual child."
There was a small moment of silence in the room... Following that, Amy was hugged, "Amy..."
"Don't..." She didn't want to hear comforting words. They weren't going to change anything... And she was tired of hearing them already.
Amy heard a sigh, "Do you really think there have ever been a single day where I didn't consider you my child?"
"Plenty. We've only known each other for four or so years anyways." Amy flatly replied.
A giggle came out in response, "That may be so... But you have been my child since even before your wedding. And nothing in this world or any other will change that." There was still warmth in those words... Amy knew she meant it, yet she couldn't understand how.
"... Why do you care so much for me?" Amy felt tears leaving her glass-filled eye sockets.
"Do I need a reason to care for the people I love?" The question made Amy's heart ache.
"When this person killed your son!?" Amy shouted.
"Amy!" Her mother-in-law shouted back.
"When this person killed your grandchild!?" Amy's tears flowed freely. She hated it so much... She hated herself so much.
And yet, she could not storm off the tent like she wanted to. She could not simply end the conversation she wanted to run away from. She could not stop herself from hearing what she did not desire to...
She could only stay still and cry as the hug tightened around her, "It was not your fault..."
"Lies..." Amy muttered.
"It was not. And I will tell you this as many times as you need, until you accept it." Her mother-in-law, unsurprisingly, refused to budge.
"... Telling me that won't change the truth." Amy started sobbing.
"Amy..." Her mother-in-law sighed, "You were pregnant. You were more vulnerable than normal... Of course your husband would prioritize protecting you above all else."
"... He died for nothing." Amy replied in-between her sobs.
"He died for you." Amy knew that, she knew it way too well... And she hated it, "It was because of him that you are still here with us... That I can hug you like this." Her mother-in-law rested her chin on Amy's shoulder, "This matters... You matter."
"... How can I matter when I couldn't even save my own child?" Amy's sobs got stronger.
"Your miscarriage was not your fault... You were wounded. Zalrisis was spreading through your wound..." Amy could hear her mother-in-law sob too, "We were the ones who failed you."
"Mother..." Amy hated it... She was hurting those she loved... Again, "It was not your fault... I should, I should have just been more careful. I shouldn't have gotten wounded in the first place."
"You? The blind pregnant woman running from a crystal monster? You were the one who should have been more careful?" Her mother-in-law sighed again, "Amy... It was already a miracle that you were able to get back to us safely... Why do you blame yourself so much?"
"... How could I not? Leon would still be here if it wasn't for me... Your family would still be whole if it wasn't for me..." Amy couldn't keep going. She just continued sobbing... She really didn't want to have this conversation.
"You are still here. Amy... People die here regularly. You know that. It wasn't just Leon that was taken away by Zalrea in the past few years... But you're still here... Our family is still here... Why can't you be happy with that?" Amy had no response to her mother-in-law's words... She just kept on sobbing.
Her mother-in-law waited for a bit, before eventually sighing, "Could it be that I'm the only one who thought of you as family?"
"N-no!" Amy instantly replied.
"Have I never been a mother to you, Amy?" Her mother-in-law seemed to ignore that.
"T-that's not true!" Amy shouted.
"Do you wish you had your birth mother with you instead of me-?" Amy couldn't handle it anymore.
"Stop it!" Amy cut her, "You're my only mother! You're the only mother I have ever had! You, Leon and father are the only family I have ever had!"
"Amy..." Her mother-in-law's tone was sad... Yet the tightened hug felt incredibly gentle, "Why haven't you ever told me that?"
"... It's not like it mattered anyways." Nor did the fact she used to be a Starcalled matter either... She never told any of that to anybody other than Leon.
"Of course it matters." Her mother-in-law started gently rubbing Amy's belly, "You never understood what it was like to have a family... Not before you were making your own..."
"Mother..." Amy muttered as more tears ran down her face.
"Mom is fine... And here I thought you never felt close enough to me... But you just didn't know what boundaries were okay to cross, did you?" Her mother-in-law asked.
Amy was unable to deny it... So she just nodded instead. And after a small pause, "Mom...?"
"Yes?" Her mother-in-law said.
"... I miss Leon." Amy stated.
"I know." Her mother-in-law replied.
"I'm sorry that he died protecting me." Amy said.
"I know." Her mother-in-law replied.
"I'm sorry I couldn't give you a grandchild..." Amy was having a hard time continuing speaking. The sobs were getting stronger again.
"I know." Her mother-in-law replied with the same words once again.
"Mom... I love you." Amy barely managed to say.
"I love you too." Her mother-in-law gently replied, then kissed the top of Amy's forehead, "You're my precious beloved daughter, and I'll always love you, no matter what."
"... Okay... Thank you..." Amy decided to finally lean into her mom's embrace, and let herself be comforted for now... She knew it was not going to get rid of her guilt, but... For now at least, she decided to accept her mom's kindness.
She was sitting down inside the tent, feeling both pleased by the feeling, and a bit annoyed at the fact she was once again being taken care of after she finished bathing... She really wished her family allowed her a little more independence.
Nonetheless, that was the current state of things. There was nothing she could do about it other than sigh.
"Something on your mind?" Amy heard the very familiar voice coming from right behind her.
"Nothing much... Just the same as always, mother." There was no point in trying to complain about it. She knew her mother-in-law was not going to give in.
Besides... They were almost done by now anyways.
"Same as always... So you're thinking about how lucky you are to have a lovely mom taking care of you like this!?" She started tickling Amy
"M-mother!?" Amy started struggling under the attack, but it was no use, "W-what's up with that...? I'm not a kid..."
The tickling stopped, "To me you very much feel like a kid." There was warmth in her voice. It was obvious that she was smiling, even to a blind person.
Amy's mood just plummeted as she heard that though, "... This is the kind of thing you should reserve to your actual child."
There was a small moment of silence in the room... Following that, Amy was hugged, "Amy..."
"Don't..." She didn't want to hear comforting words. They weren't going to change anything... And she was tired of hearing them already.
Amy heard a sigh, "Do you really think there have ever been a single day where I didn't consider you my child?"
"Plenty. We've only known each other for four or so years anyways." Amy flatly replied.
A giggle came out in response, "That may be so... But you have been my child since even before your wedding. And nothing in this world or any other will change that." There was still warmth in those words... Amy knew she meant it, yet she couldn't understand how.
"... Why do you care so much for me?" Amy felt tears leaving her glass-filled eye sockets.
"Do I need a reason to care for the people I love?" The question made Amy's heart ache.
"When this person killed your son!?" Amy shouted.
"Amy!" Her mother-in-law shouted back.
"When this person killed your grandchild!?" Amy's tears flowed freely. She hated it so much... She hated herself so much.
And yet, she could not storm off the tent like she wanted to. She could not simply end the conversation she wanted to run away from. She could not stop herself from hearing what she did not desire to...
She could only stay still and cry as the hug tightened around her, "It was not your fault..."
"Lies..." Amy muttered.
"It was not. And I will tell you this as many times as you need, until you accept it." Her mother-in-law, unsurprisingly, refused to budge.
"... Telling me that won't change the truth." Amy started sobbing.
"Amy..." Her mother-in-law sighed, "You were pregnant. You were more vulnerable than normal... Of course your husband would prioritize protecting you above all else."
"... He died for nothing." Amy replied in-between her sobs.
"He died for you." Amy knew that, she knew it way too well... And she hated it, "It was because of him that you are still here with us... That I can hug you like this." Her mother-in-law rested her chin on Amy's shoulder, "This matters... You matter."
"... How can I matter when I couldn't even save my own child?" Amy's sobs got stronger.
"Your miscarriage was not your fault... You were wounded. Zalrisis was spreading through your wound..." Amy could hear her mother-in-law sob too, "We were the ones who failed you."
"Mother..." Amy hated it... She was hurting those she loved... Again, "It was not your fault... I should, I should have just been more careful. I shouldn't have gotten wounded in the first place."
"You? The blind pregnant woman running from a crystal monster? You were the one who should have been more careful?" Her mother-in-law sighed again, "Amy... It was already a miracle that you were able to get back to us safely... Why do you blame yourself so much?"
"... How could I not? Leon would still be here if it wasn't for me... Your family would still be whole if it wasn't for me..." Amy couldn't keep going. She just continued sobbing... She really didn't want to have this conversation.
"You are still here. Amy... People die here regularly. You know that. It wasn't just Leon that was taken away by Zalrea in the past few years... But you're still here... Our family is still here... Why can't you be happy with that?" Amy had no response to her mother-in-law's words... She just kept on sobbing.
Her mother-in-law waited for a bit, before eventually sighing, "Could it be that I'm the only one who thought of you as family?"
"N-no!" Amy instantly replied.
"Have I never been a mother to you, Amy?" Her mother-in-law seemed to ignore that.
"T-that's not true!" Amy shouted.
"Do you wish you had your birth mother with you instead of me-?" Amy couldn't handle it anymore.
"Stop it!" Amy cut her, "You're my only mother! You're the only mother I have ever had! You, Leon and father are the only family I have ever had!"
"Amy..." Her mother-in-law's tone was sad... Yet the tightened hug felt incredibly gentle, "Why haven't you ever told me that?"
"... It's not like it mattered anyways." Nor did the fact she used to be a Starcalled matter either... She never told any of that to anybody other than Leon.
"Of course it matters." Her mother-in-law started gently rubbing Amy's belly, "You never understood what it was like to have a family... Not before you were making your own..."
"Mother..." Amy muttered as more tears ran down her face.
"Mom is fine... And here I thought you never felt close enough to me... But you just didn't know what boundaries were okay to cross, did you?" Her mother-in-law asked.
Amy was unable to deny it... So she just nodded instead. And after a small pause, "Mom...?"
"Yes?" Her mother-in-law said.
"... I miss Leon." Amy stated.
"I know." Her mother-in-law replied.
"I'm sorry that he died protecting me." Amy said.
"I know." Her mother-in-law replied.
"I'm sorry I couldn't give you a grandchild..." Amy was having a hard time continuing speaking. The sobs were getting stronger again.
"I know." Her mother-in-law replied with the same words once again.
"Mom... I love you." Amy barely managed to say.
"I love you too." Her mother-in-law gently replied, then kissed the top of Amy's forehead, "You're my precious beloved daughter, and I'll always love you, no matter what."
"... Okay... Thank you..." Amy decided to finally lean into her mom's embrace, and let herself be comforted for now... She knew it was not going to get rid of her guilt, but... For now at least, she decided to accept her mom's kindness.