Private Quest (Honey Home in Danger) Busy Beatings

[Amity]

@Marigold Diablo

Amity gently drifted to a stop in Honey Home as she looked around. Much like a kangaroo, she had Marigold in tow as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

"I don't see any defense force, Mari, do you think they were wiped out~?"

Amity tilted her head.

"But the town seems safe enough~ What a mystery~"

In reality, the quest had been issued a month ago. The battle was likely already over, and Amity had clearly missed the memo.

"Well I'm hungry~ maybe we can ask the bakery baker if he's heard any news~? Phew, you know you'd think floating would be easy, and it is, but it still takes it out of you after awhile, I think I'd like to learn now to make chairs next~"

And so, Amity landed and marched toward her favorite bakery as people panicked and practically leapt into their houses like an old spaghetti western shoot out was about to occur at the sight of the very obviously magia, magia. It would seem even boonie-living had caught wind of 'The recent Astorea troubles, no not those, I'm talking about the rampaging metal people one'.

Amity tilted her head again and gazed at the sky.

"Hm~ the town sure is quiet today but at least there won't be a line~ It's always a little sad when your secret stop gets popular you know~? ~It's like I'm glad they're doing well but now just look at all this ruckus~!"

Opening the door Amit said----

"HellooOOooOOoooOOo. I would like a dozen Honey Home swirls..."

---As the baker screamed.

"...ehehe you drive a hard bargain~ two dozen it is~! Ah~ and whatever my companion would like. Oh~ right~ Have you seen any kobolds~?"

 

[Marigold Diablo]

Landing in the middle town, Marigold also took notice of everyone screaming.

"What? Ya never seen a FAERIN before?! Jeez I heard that there was some racial bias against Faerin but never realized it was this bad."

When Ultima mentioned the bakery, Marigold perked up.

"Ohhh that does sound nice. I've been eating random forest mushrooms for the past few days. Only got poisoned a couple of times but nothing this Faerin stomach can't handle."

Marigold pattered her stomach smugly, then followed Ultima in the bakery.

"You're going to have to buy though. All I've got is a cool rock and my pocket frog. Oh! Look at all the bread! I'd almost forgot what actual food that wasn't scoured from the forest floor or the garbage looked like! I want a muffin! Blueberry or strawberry! No no, both! All the berries, drizzle some chocolate on that mother as well! Ah craps, gotta talk right."

Marigold crossed her arms and looked up to the baker.

"I request that thou... bringeth me... the every berry muffin. A muffin ripeth with berries of every costanza. Yes, the most heinous of big... no... the most heinous of Galapagos-sized muffins thou hast in thy... possession. For I am Marigold Diablo! Sorceress Supreme and eater of.... muffins..."

@Ultima

 

[Amity]

@Marigold Diablo

"And that should complete our order...hm...?"

Amity tilted her head as her index finger rose to her lip in confusion. The baker was asleep. No, actually, he'd attempted to scramble up the wall backwards and gradually passed out from terror.

"Oh~ that explains it~ it must be siesta time~!"

Clapping her hands together as if to celebrate the explanation, the window to Amity's right shattered as a something blasted through it. It may have been a kobold. It may have been, but Kolbolds usually lacked magi-tech apperata such as the metallic clamp arm this window crasher had used to snatch Amity and plow her through the opposite wall.

"Owie~!"

A voice came from the other side of the comically Amity shaped hole in the wall.

"Marigooooold I think I found the kooooboooold~"

The crashing continued.

"I think I dropped my purse at your feeeeeeeet could you pick it uppppppp~ I'm still hungrrrrry~"

Amity's distress hardly seemed that distressful likely on account of her ghostly durability. She was, however, 'indisposed' or 'tanking it' as the gamers would say.

 

[Marigold Diablo]

"Why is everything always so weird..."

Marigold sighed and as looked at the magia-kobold hybrid monstrosity.

"I just wanted to be like Gandalf, or maybe even Saruman, just a cool wizard type. But every time I try and go on an adventure everything just ends up crazy. Why can't we ever just fight the cursed souls of former kings that are hunting a ring, or even a snake man trying to rule a high school."

As she rambled, Marigold readied her magic.

"Well, whatever. Just have to roll with the punches... HEY KOBOLD! EAT MARIGOLD'S MAGICAL MAGIC BLAST THINGY! ZOOPAYOOOOOO!"

Calling out her made up magical word, Marigold Diablo mimed pushing out great waves of magical energy at the magia kobold. At first nothing happened, then...

"Uh oh... nothing happened."

As Marigold spoke pink bubbles began to float out of her mouth.

"What's going on? Ummm... well, have some of this! Pink... bubble... magic go!"

Not sure what to do, Marigold did the only thing she could think of. She blew the bubbles at the kobold. The bubbles wafted closer to the kobold until the first one brushed into it... and exploded violently into a rainbow of destruction.

"HAH! I KNEW IT! I KNEW IT WOULD DO SOMETHING GOOD! SEE?! EVERYONE WAS PROBABLY THINKING THAT I WAS AN IDIOT, BUT NO! IT WAS AN ATTACK ALL ALONG!"

As Marigold continued to speak, some of the bubbles began to fly randomly off course causing collateral damage.

@Ultima (Amity)

 

[Amity]

"Hmmmmmm~"

Amity considered her partner's woes as she phased past the koborg just in time for a bubble to waft into it and explode. The blast gave her the opportunity to gain a little space.

"I think what you're looking for is further east. Falldownatown? Yeah~ it was something like that~ I read in a magazine that it was number one for getting stabbed by mysterious shadow people ~ Super interesting right~? I wonder what that's about~"

Amity snapped her fingers to manifest an Animancy barrier which she carefully folded into a harisen fan. A stray bubble drifted toward her as she took a batter's stance.

"And swing~!"

*ponk*

She batted the bubble as the koborg charged and it exploded right into it.

"But you know~ I really like Honeyhome, everyone so nice~ fresh air, fresher bread, presumably reasonable property prices~ what more could a person ask for~?"

She mused this time using the fan as a driver with a perfect swing.

"Fore~!"

She held a hand to block the sun as she watched the bubble do a loopty loop corkscrew through the air and colide with the koborg in yet another explosion. The koborg roared.

"Well maybe less Kobold-robot-thinges. Well Marigold~ am I good or wha----"

Turning around and giving a thumbs up, Amity's cheek collided with something. It was a pink bubble. What followed, of course, was the blast.

@Marigold Diablo

 

[Marigold Diablo]

"Yikes."

Marigold, cringed as she noticed the collateral damage she had caused, including that to her partner Amity. Thankfully, the bubbles had also taken out the mecha-kobold in question so all's well that ends well.

We gotta get out of here before the town starts thinking we're the bad guys...

"Welp, there ya have it villagers we saved the day... of course there was some extra damage but nothing that a little woodwork and spackle couldn't handle. Pretty easy if you ask me. In fact, I'd probably do it for you if I wasn't so busy being the supreme sorceress and crazy talented hero that I am. But either way, at least you don't have that other guy--"

Suddenly, one villager interrupted Marigold flatly.

"Get out."

"What was that, sorry I didn't."

"Get out! Now!"

The old villagers face looked like he was ready to roll up his sleeves and engage in some no-holds-barred fisticuffs with the diminuitive Marigold. Understanding that it was probably high time to get the hell out of there while still able to call it a job done well enough, Marigold jogged over to amity in an attempt to either help her get up or drag her away from the scene of the battle.

"Well then, like I said that does it for us. Come on, Amity time to go looks like they don't want to take up any more of our heroic time, so we should get a move on before they start celebrating our deeds with pitchforks and torches. Time to head out. Come on now, chop chop!"


@Ultima (amity)

 

[Amity]

@Marigold Diablo

"You know~ and I didn't even get my bread~"

Amity placed a hand on her cheek and shook her head with a troubled little sigh.

"Being a hero sure is hard goldstuff~ you know~ having to leave to protect the people and all that~ how did it go~?"

Amity cleared her throat and sterned up her eyebrows, as she did an impression.

"They're not the heroes we need right now. But they're the heroes... heroeing...? ----They did the thing. So we'll chase them, because we erm... chase heroes..."

Growing more and more confused, Amity looked down at Marigold.

"You know, I never understood what that entire scene was talking about. But, what I do know is it sure is hard being good guys~ oh... oh no-nos..."

Amity realized looking back, things were still plinking and plonking off her head from the villager's surprisingly good throwing form as she did so.

"I forgot my purse."

*Bonk*

"Oh, nevermind~ here it is. Yay~!"

Holding up a V sign, Amity then followed along humming Hero by Enrique Igelesias only more than a little off-key.


=====

The camera pans upward toward the clouds as Amity's terrible humming continued until, suddenly, it stopped.

Duh duhn...

The camera quickly drops its shot to the where the koborg's body is... only.... there is no koborg there.

A mechanical laugh is heard that sounds like a lot of rattling pots and pans put through a synthesizer at a 90's dance club.

Cut to black.


=====


The end.