Private Providence Beef and Broccoli

[Ivben Burns III]

The forest at the base of the mountains of Providence was silent and still as the morning sun had yet to rise. Ivben, however, ended this silence with a loud and long gravely yawn. As every day was a blessing to him, he tried his best to make use of as many seconds as he could and would frequently rise before the crack of the dawns' warm gaze. Quietly as to not disturb he fellow compatriots, he walked to a nearby stream to get a refreshing morning breakfast and munched on a few fragrant leaves he had foraged the previous day.

It was a relaxing simple 'breakfast' for sure, but the beautiful scenery combined with the lovely silence struck the perfect spot in his soul. It was clear that today was going to be a sunny clear day of fun and excitement with his newly acquired friends!

He sat down next to the waters edge and stared up into the distant tall mountains and began to think out loud. He soon became a bit anxious as he thought about the future of what's to come.

"With zese legs and zis body of mine, even ze tallesht of ze montain can be das conquered and trafersed. Zis world and the inoshent peoples therein are so precious and I'd love to protect zem all.... But how can I protecht and serfe ze citizens of sie das World if I don't even have sie basic tools of sie trade!!! Ach du meine Güte!!! I need sie tools so bad but I know deep zat the future ez bright un iz das limitless!!!"

A subtle tone of brief melancholy combined with unwavering hope and positivity swept over him as he finished his breakfast before gazing off into the distant towering mountains.

@Nota Oldman

 

[Nota Oldman]

Nota had been admiring the scenery by the stream when the bumbling buffoon of the group stumbled out, making a huge racket. The green haired 'youth' wanted to call out and admonish the giant, but something they said caught his ear. Something he empathized with and couldn't fault.

He too had been thankful for his chance to move around freely, unimpeded by his body. The ability to climb these mountains and hike freely wasn't something he had looked forward too, but knowing he could perform such acts made him happy. Instead of chiming in, Nota continued to sit while the brute loudly munched on his food and slurped his tea, even talking of tools and whatnot.

"Then let's get us some tools, eh old fella?"

Standing from his nook near the roots at the base of a tree, Nota patted his rear, removing loose leaves and dirt. He was mildly amused that Ivben hadn't noticed him this whole time. It spoke to the simplicity of his character. These kind of folk were actually preferable when it came to companions. You didn't have to worry about them backstabbing you. A rarity in the business realm Nota was used to.

"I've never done it before, but I reckon if we head up those hills towards the base of the mountain, we can find raw materials. I've never made tools before, beyond simple repairs to farm equipment, has me a bit curious."

Walking up and attempting to pat the old fellow on the back, Nota would skip slightly, hopping over the stream and beginning to head north. The rest of the group were still asleep, so he may as well make a small morning expedition. Having the big guy would make the tasks at hand much easier, especially the lifting. If they were lucky, Nota would be able to collect more soil samples and forage for interesting fauna.

@Ivben Burns III

 

[Ivben Burns III]

Nota's sudden voice quite startled Ivben who turned to the side and was quite surprised to see that the green lush bush next to him was in fact a head of hair with a person under it. After a brief moment of confusion and delight, he continued to listen to the bright ideas that Nota had suggested with great enthusiasm. How smart! If you don't have the tools why not craft them yourself!

A deep roar of laughter rang out from his grizzly lungs as he spoke with excitement,

"Heh heh heh! Zen let's leafe at once Nota. Ze mountains vill surely hafe ze raw materials zat ve need! I am actcually somesing of a schteel worker myzelf! I grew up in a steel mill. If we can find some of ze quality raw materialz and zen a facility zat has some tools of sie trade zen I'm certain I can make something for me and for you if you'd like! Plus ze journey will be perfect to get ze muscles and ze meat on your skinny boney body! Ach ha he ho!"

Without delay, he shakily stood up as he wove his hands around to maintain balance. It was still a little tricky for him to walk properly but everyday he had been progressing more and more. The idea of going to the mountains could definitely spell danger for someone who had only spent about three months relearning to walk, but opportunity only came to those who tried new things. Soon in a crazed excitement began haphazardly running alongside the stream whilst flailing his arms about to maintain proper balance. He then head towards the precarious peaks in the distance whilst ushering the youngster beside him to hurry along suite.

 

[Nota Oldman]

Nota pinched his temples at the mention of putting muscle on his skinny boney body. He had no intentions of putting on weight, and definitely no intention of looking like Ivben. The man was massive with an overbearing amount of musculature. Nota couldn't imagine how tiring it was to move around in that husk.

"I will never be lookin' like you, friend. Especially not if we're hiking up a mountainside. That's literally the opposite of putting on muscle, that's calorie burning, pal."

He was fairly certain at this point that Ivben didn't have the same physique in real life. This called into question whether he was actually an older gentleman or not. It wasn't too important, but the impression that Nota had of him was that they were from a similar generation.

"A steel worker though? That's interesting. Are you experienced at making tools then? I don't think we'll be finding modern implements, so I hope you can handle a forge."

Talking as they walked, Nota tried to spark some conversation to learn about his companion. Of course, it was angled at the matter at hand. He was exploring Iven's skill as a blacksmith, considering modern steel working probably wasn't applicable. Was this big oaf going to be more useful than expected? Nota had intended to have the man carry the materials so they could find a working smith to take care of it. If they could cut out the middle man, this would be way cheaper for them.

Eventually, the waterside began to wind back and fourth, rising up as the slope gently raised. It must be a stream of runoff from the mountains. The woods didn't thin, but they began to transition into different foliage. The air cooled as the landscape shifted, and peculiarly, the forest started to become denser with birch trees. Nota wasn't familiar with birch trees being at higher altitude.

"Interesting... Take a look at th-"

A loud crack sounded that caused Nota to stop in his tracks. There was something brittle beneath his feet, partially hidden by a thin silt cover. It was bones. The gnaw marks made it hard to tell if they were human or beast, but scanning the area, it became apparent there were more bones in the area. The ground was littered with them, beneath leaf cover and dirt, sticking out partially exposed. It was unnerving.

@Ivben Burns III

 

[Ivben Burns III]

Ivben was a bit disappointed to hear that the wee lad was not interested in building a bit of muscle. He hadn't even got to introduce to the kid the idea he had which involved dragging dead logs uphill during their journey! Either way he didn't mind too much because he was confident that Nota would quickly realize the benefits to acquiring a muscular form such as his.

He then nodded in response to the question about creating tools from steel and said,

"Ja! Ofcourse zat is sie trus. Its been a bit of awhile but all you need eis ze perfect blenden of ze iron and sie silicon and sie phosphorus and sie oxygen and sie das sulfur as well as sie carbon actuator. Although I haven't been to a city durin' ze time zat I'fe been here there has to be ze blast furnace somewhere no? Its such a common ting. I remember when I was a lad in sie ripe age of 6 and sie blast furnace of sie das steel mill of my family. Funny ting about zie blast furnace was----"

Ivben continued to drone on and on as they walked up the subtle sloping landscape. It felt so rewarding to befriend someone that seemed interested in learning more about you! Eventually the duo arrived to a sort of transitionary location as the forest had a sudden shift in flora. He too heard the crunch and looked down to see that they had randomly walked into what appeared to be a bone yard with multitudinous white barked tress scattered about.

A bit a panic washed over him as a children's story seemed to pop up into his thoughts which gave him even more of a worry. He still wasn't used to this odd place and didn't quite understand how some things could work but he knew that this world contained a somewhat hint of fantasy which seemed to bore only one likely conclusion to him. He then yelled in a slight panicked tone,

"Herrschaftszeiten! It looks like we are no doubt near ze lair of ze Pied Piper of Hameln. He was an evil rat catcher zat would play ze pipe and lure both rats and children to his lair before killenk zem and scatterenk ze bones across ze lands. You must be vigiliant since you are of ze prime age to be ze target no? We must move quickly less you be ze das slaughtered!"

With even wasting a moments noticed he wildly power walked across the area in circles hoping to brainstorm an idea to survive this terrible zone. His slight fright due to the unexpected circumstances caused his already unsteady saunter to involve even more flailing of the arms than normal. Suddenly an idea popped into his mind after spotting an especially round and rotund hefty specimen of a tree and he then said to Nota,

"Eureka! Climben sie big tree here. I will help you wis ze big muscles of mine while you get a better view of sie area and spot any possible hostile pipers nearestby. We must make haste young Nota!"

Ivben then popped a low squat near the base of the tree while cupping his hands together. He was prepared to provide as much assistance that he could to enable a swift ascent of the tree post haste!
@Nota Oldman

 

[Nota Oldman]

Nota was less than enthused about Ivben's ability to make the tools after his most recent revelation. Blast furnaces? The green haired lad wasn't completely sure, but he suspected that such a device would not be present. They would have to visit town to confirm it, but this was a fantastical land with magic and martial skill. Blast furnaces didn't seem like the most likely device to be here.

"That story is nonsense. Not a single thing you just said is relevant at all. First off, I'm not a child. I am likely older than you, old chap. Secondly, that is a child's tale from outside the game. It has no bearing here. It didn't have bearing back home either. It's fiction. A dumb story. And no, climbing that tree won't help me spot any pipers, or anything useful. I cannot believe..."

Stamping his foot, Nota began to grind his heel into the ground. A crack was produced as he stepped on yet more bones, but these were much more brittle. Glancing down, they were worn away and thin. It seemed as if they were partially digested or as if some corrosive fluid had come into contact with them. They had somehow been processed into their current state.

The brief distraction settled Nota down. He had become frustrated with his traveling companions nonsense conclusions and assertions, to the point he was angry. Breathing in and out through his nose, Nota stepped towards Ivben in order to humor the man. The behemoth was squatting next to a tree, offering to push Nota up. It was a pointless act, but Nota was slightly curious about climbing a tree. He hadn't done it in over 40 years.

"Fine. Just hold steady then."

Stepping into the man's palms, Nota quickly pushed down in order to propel himself up. He embraced the round of the tree and slowly shimmied his way up while stepping up the other man's torso. When he could reach a low hanging branch, Nota clutched at it and struggled a bit to hoist himself up and over. He was only a good eight or so feet off the ground, but the vantage was a little exciting. Patting his hands he noticed that they weren't scraped up at all.

Reaching down, Nota ran his fingers over the surface of the branch and was surprised to find it quite smooth. Knocking a few times, it sounded off with a dull thud that was moderately different from what he expected. It wasn't hollow or anything like that, but the sensation was off.

"And as expected no... huh. That... is a piper?"

Nota's slender arm was outstretched pointing up the incline as it got steeper. Up near the top was a long limbed being that was vaguely humanoid in appearance with some sort of black feathery headdress. It was hard to make out many details, but they seemed savage in appearance. They had something slung over their shoulder, and after pausing at the edge of the cliff, they tossed it down, sending loose silt cascading down the slope.

@Ivben Burns III

 

[Ivben Burns III]

Deep down, Ivben was furiously giggling and laughing to himself. He could hardly believe that his poor acting of surprise and 'fear' was able to get this silly sap to climb a tree. It was simply hilarity incarnate. Tears were starting to fall from his face as he it scrunched up whilst he tried his best from cracking up into a fit of laughter. Once the apparently old small man was fully ascended up the tree he could no longer hold it in and relentlessly roared out in cackle of laughter.

"ACHT! Eh heh heh HEH! Ah hah hah! I have das gotten you old man! Zie Ivben has made you work out sie core and sie arms and sie das glutes! Bit by bit you vill burnen sie calories and gainink sie muskles!"

Ivben then collapsed to the ground and began to wipe away the tears from his face that was turning red from the ferocity of his laughter. What a funny thought, the great brave and fearless Ivben AFRAID??? Preposterous! Eventually he regained his composure and stood up to prepare to catch the tiny tot less he slip and fall. Although Ivben liked to joke and have fun, safety and wellbeing was always his number one priority and he'd never let someone get injured due to his silly antics.

As he stood up, he felt the crunchy soil below the tree and figured it was just some dried leaves; not even bothering to give it a second thought. The big muscular man continue to observe the young old man on in the tree until he said something quite peculiar that almost made Ivben soar into another round of laughter. He then shouted with a big smile,

"Very funny young green haired 'oldtimer'. Always funny to be pullink zie das leg wit ze jokes and ze goofs and sie gafs! But why would a .. a... a... Pi-Pi PIPER!"

Ivben had been stepping a few paces back with his over seven foot tall body to tree to humor Nota when he suddenly saw the blurry figure up the cliff through the branches. Even including what appeared to be a blurry feathered hat and all. Although Ivben was not afraid of any harm coming to himself, he still was worried that this potential crazed piper would murder his new friend! Without any delay he shouted to Nota in a blaring voice full of concern,

"Nota we must be gettink you out of here less ze piper kill you dead! Quick jumpen sie down and I will catch you zen we must take ze cover and hide or he will be ze findink you!"

Ivben stretched out his arms and prepared to catch Nota when he noticed that the blurry figure seemed to turn his attention to them after the probably ill advised shouting. The blurred guy slowly reached down and pulled a long cylindrical object out of his pocket and brought it to his face. Ivben in response waved his arms frantically to hurry along before turning around into a sprint to find any sort of cover in the area.
@Nota Oldman

 

[Nota Oldman]

Crawling down the branch while the buffoon laughed below, Nota did his best to ignore the man. This was one weird joke that must not be translating well. At least, Nota had no clue what was funny about it. Chalking it up to a translation issue, the green haired youth focused on the matter at hand. Raising one hand, Nota shielded his eyes from the sun as he continued to watch the strange figure. Their parcel had already fallen down the hill and rolled to a spot roughly a hundred feet away from the duo.

A wild howl of a shout bellowed from below Nota, causing him to shake and lose his grip on the branch. Stumbling forward a bit, Nota flipped head first towards the leaves and thinner twigs near the end of the surface he was on. Grabbing at whatever he could, his full weight fell on supports that weren't strong enough. Handfuls of leaves and slender seed pods were all he could get a grip on, and within moments, Nota plunged towards the ground.

"Why the hell are you shouting, you bumbling oaf? I could have died if I didn't land on..."

Reaching down, Nota felt around for whatever surface he had landed on. It was textured but firm, like fabric pulled over mu-oh. Nota had landed on the mustachioed who had started shouting and waving his arms the moment they saw the being on the hill. Of course this man had started running and ran right into Nota's falling trajectory. Because why wouldn't he? Why would he not run without looking up towards the youth he had stranded in a tree?

Aggravated and with half a mind to throw punches, Nota started to clench his fist but found he was still holding onto something. Opening his palm, the small faerin was delighted to find a few seedpods that had survived the fall. These trees were quite interesting, and that tough white- Oh? Another thought popped into Nota's head. Snapping some of the small twigs that fell with him, Nota examined the white chalky material closely. If what he suspected was true, then these dissolving bones in the area made a lot of sense. He'd have to experiment later. Stuffing everything into his pockets, Nota rolled off the giant and looked back up the cliff.

"Uhhhh... About that 'piper'. It's gone, and I don't know where it went. We should get moving..."

Reaching down, Nota would offer to help lift the behemoth if he couldn't manage it by their self.

@Ivben Burns III