Private Eastern Brisshal Awkward Beginnings

[Caelia Etterni]

.

Caelia walked into one of the cafes in Honeyhome with a spring in her step. The bell over the door jingled softly, alerting the shop keeper of her entrance. She gave a little wave to the Lander who looked up at her, and they waved back. She breathed deeply the scents of baked goods, looking through the windowed containers curiously.

When the door jingled again behind her, she didn't look up. There was a chocolate croissant that just had to have her name on it... She heard the shop keeper ask if she could get Caelia anything - or, at least, she assumed she was talking to Caelia - and she began to answer:

Oh, can I get that chocolate croiss - Oh! (noticing Essence pointing at the same pastry) Did you want it, too? It's the last one... We could share, if you want? I'm Caelia, by the way, Caelia Etterni!

She held her hand out to shake, smiling brightly up at the other woman. It was a bit awkward, this situation, but maybe she'd want to share and they could laugh about it later???

@Essence

 

[Essence]

Eat, you're hungry. Don't eat, you're fat. Eat, you're too skinny. Don't eat, you need to be skinny.

Essence's inner voice, the one that obsessed over food, was ever-lingering in the back of her mind. Eating in a game still felt so strange, so foreign, because she didn't have to worry about looking a certain way. She could eat these amazing deserts that her mother always hid from her. Growing up with a mother who called you too fat at the age of 5 because of your baby fat... well, you can't escape an eating disorder when the living environment fosters it.

Yet, here she was, escaping by learning that eating isn't so bad. In fact, it's actually pretty great to visit places that are dedicated to relaxing and enjoying her once-forbidden food category. Cafes were never somewhere Essence went - she feared temptation. Stepping into one was equivalent to man's first step on the moon. The warmth of invitation, of fresh baked goods, of acceptance for herself (even if only temporary), enveloped Essence. She had noticed @Caelia Etterni but paid the Faerin no mind as she waltzed over to the counter, and pointed out what she wanted.

Interrupted, Essence lifted a brow and stared at Caelia. "Um, no," The Elf flipped hair over her shoulder and placed a hand on one hip, now facing the other girl. "You can have it. I'm really not that picky," she reached out to shake Caelia's hand before asking the shopkeeper for a raspberry cream croissant. "I'm Essence."

Essence had barely explored the world of eating pastries. She wasn't quite ready for sharing. However, Essence was a bit endeared by Caelia's offer, even if it was personally offensive to the part of her controlled by an eating disorder. In the real world, she would've snarled in disgust, and snatched the chocolate croissant out of resentment. Fortunately, Terra had given her leeway with exploring new things, and new reactions to certain situations.

"Sit with me anyways. I like company." The Elf grinned, accepting her croissant, nodding towards a table where the two could talk. If they were to share, they'd end up sitting together anyways. And Caelia probably wanted someone around, or so Essence thought. Why else would the girl offer up half of her food?

 

[Caelia Etterni]

.

Caelia looked just a little bit crestfallen for a moment when the Elf said "um, no" and placed a hand on her hip. Crap, had she offended her somehow? She almost withdrew her hand, but a moment later the other woman was shaking it and introducing herself. Okay, so probably not as bad an interaction as she was fearing it had been about to become...!

I'd be happy to sit with you, Essence!

She took her pastry and paid before heading over to the table that the other had gestured to. She pulled out a seat, taking it and crossing one leg over the other at the knee.

So, are you a newer player, or a returning one? I've met a few of both, I'm still trying to figure out a good way to tell the difference on sight... I haven't had good luck with that yet, haha.

@Essence

 

[Essence]

Essence giggled at Caelia's question. She thought it was obvious that she was a newcomer. But, perhaps that perception of herself was skewed by her own perceptions? The more she thought about it, the more Essence realized that, yeah, she rarely picked out newbies from a crowd. More often, long-time players were recognizable by reputation, feats, or gear: they were the players you knew undoubtedly weren't beginners.

"Same here, girl. You got me thinkin' about that. I thought it was obvious I'm fresh meat out here. But you couldn't tell so that's a good sign," she tore up her croissant into a million tiny, even pieces, with the quickness and precision of someone who has done this her whole life. Essence generally ate every food each cut-up bit one at a time, slowly, and stuck to that. "Yes, I'm new. I wish I wasn't, though. I could've used Terra a long time ago. It's nice to get away," she sighed.

Noticing Caelia's posture, Essence sat up straight, brushed her dress off, and crossed a leg, too. "I like the way you carry yourself. It's like this whole... thing," her hand gestured towards Caelia's body. "the way you carry yourself. And dress. It's giving very regal-type vibes. It's different than the way you talk. But I like that. Like," she drew out the "like", and clicked her tongue, narrowing her eyes. "when you talk I imagine shy-girl, soft-girl. But when I see you, I'm almost thinking mommy, step on me, bad bitch vibes. That probably works really well for you. Didn't that one President dude say speak soft and have a big dick?" she paused and laughed. "I'm joking. Not about you having a big dick, though, metaphorically of course. I'm not that stupid. But you probably thought I was for a second, right? Anyways. Keep being yourself because no one will expect you to throat punch them. Which is good! For when you need to throat punch them."

Essence decided to leave out the many times she had throat-punched people she didn't like. When you're a pretty girl you have to learn to throw hands. Or, even worse, when someone cares for you too much and wants to get closer... and you have to call the person you throat-punched to hook up with them so the person who cares for you will be heartbroken and leave! Essence's train of thought took her somewhere else, so she centered herself in the moment, to be with Caelia and the croissant and the cafe rather than with the terrible things she's done. Which seems to keep creeping up on her even in Terra.

"Have you met anyone interesting? Or, have you met someone in a way that's more awkward than pointing at the same pastry as them?"

@Caelia Etterni

 

[Caelia Etterni]

.

Caelia either didn't notice or didn't comment on Essence mirroring her posture. She liked the regality of the game and pretending for a little bit that she was more important than she was outside of it. She smiled and laughed lightly as Essence began to explain her whole "thing," or at least how she saw it. Caelia remained quiet while she talked, her smile never wavering. In fact, it seemed to warm slightly as Essence went on.

Hell, who didn't like people telling you that you were a bad bitch? It was a far cry from who she was when she left the game...

It is nice to get away, like to said. My day to day outside of the game is pretty boring, if I'm honest, so getting to log in and be someone totally different is...really nice. (soft laugh) I'm glad to hear I give off more powerful vibes, though, considering I'm not very big or intimidating on the outside. I like to look regal, as you put it. It's nice to feel like more than just an NPC, you know?

She paused to take a few bites from her croissant, looking up as Essence asked if she'd met anyone interesting.

Well... I met this player named Kaede a while back. They said they're stuck in the game, can you believe that? I'm not honestly sure if she was just hazing me or serious... I mean, she sounded serious, but the more I think about it, the more I can't help but wonder if I just fell for this elaborate prank all the veterans are pulling on us newbies. Like, how can you really get stuck in a game? It's not... It's not possible, right?

@Essence

 

[Essence]

Caelia's positive reactions (or, maybe, a lack of any negative reactions) to her inevitable ramblings fostered a comfortable environment between the two. At the very least, Essence felt that she could speak and be heard, sit back and eat without being stared at, just take in the moment with this girl who was immensely kind even though she didn't have to be. Who sat with Essence despite not having to be here at all. And for each "she doesn't have to do this" thought that formed in the back of her mind, the Elf felt a stronger sense of appreciation for Caelia. The conversations that were casual, and chill, she craved: Essence needed attention without it being rooted in deep ideas or complicated relationships or her having to go to extreme ends to earn it. Here, right now, she had someone who gave a shit enough to small talk without staring at her chest, wanting sex in return, or seeking out the challenge of cracking her hard exterior. Not being used to either, Essence felt... strange. But not tense. She was quite content, actually.

"Yeah. I get that more than you know. I wouldn't say my life outside of here is boring," Essence laughed nervously, darting her eyes away for a moment. It wasn't fun, either, but she wasn't going to give that passing thought enough time to shimmy its way into her mind. The Elf's focus re-centered on Caelia's presence, her smile re-forming. "I'm sure yours isn't that bad, though. Just compared to here it's like... uh, yeah, why would I want to work a 9-5 when I can go kick ass and fuck around in a game instead? Then that's when your real life becomes boring. Except for the vacations and all that, obviously. Those are always gonna be fun,"

Stuck in a game? Essence lifted her eyes to the ceiling in thought. It sounded silly, sure, but not worth the effort to convince someone to prank them. In fact, it sounded a little more like a scare tactic than a prank, considering being unable to return to the real world wouldn't be good. For most people. "Did you ask if Kaede meant that she was addicted to the game and always, like, playing, or something? I don't really know if someone could get stuck cause, uh, scientifically, that don't really add up. You would die without food and water pretty quickly. And our body decays, not to mention if someone is brain-dead that means they've lost consciousness, so they wouldn't even be able to start up the game let alone play in it," Essence shrugged, unbothered because the topic was interesting, and not requiring her to access any personal emotion to analyze the possibility.

"Maybe her existence was, like, copied into the game, and her real self is logged out, or she died and this is her consciousness living on. Like heaven! Ohmigosh, Terra does give off Heaven vibes sometimes," shaking her head, returning to the point, Essence bit into her croissant and finished her thoughts.

"What I'm saying is she's either delusional, basically a zombie, addicted to the game, or an NPC coded to have enough self-awareness to creep other players out. I'm putting bets on the addiction... I, uh, know someone who has that kind of issue. Even if we could get stuck, Terra's not that bad of a place to be. You shouldn't worry about it. But ask Kaede again when you see her, and then text me the details cause ya girl needs to know what's happenin'."

@Caelia Etterni

 

[Caelia Etterni]

.

Similarly to Essence, though she didn't know it, Caelia felt a sense of contentment sitting here talking to the Elf. She was so scared of people in real life, hiding away and avoiding them as much as possible, so feeling this contentment around someone who was essentially a stranger was strange. She knew it was strange, even if she didn't dwell on it too much. Caelia had often wondered why her agoraphobia had never followed her into the online world. Why was it so much easier to befriend people here, especially when they looked and sounded and felt so real? Maybe it was that there was still a sense of disconnect, knowing that they were just avatars of someone else she'd never have to face in reality.

After all, Caelia was nothing like Maggie. She was a farce, a lie, an illusion. She was just pretending to be confident, pretending to be self assured. It was all a game within a game.

I didn't ask if she was addicted to it. I don't know, the way she described it was just...weird. I guess you would have had to be there to hear her say it herself. She sounded so genuine about it. She said she'd... Well, she'd died in the real world, and that she was stuck here because of it. Something about losing too many lives in the game...

She paused, picking at her food a little bit and looking away. She didn't want to speak ill of Kaede, especially if she was telling the truth, but Essence made good points too. How could you get stuck in a game? If you were dead, you had no consciousness. There was nothing to get stuck...right?

Maybe I'm putting too much stock in it. It just... I don't know. It's worth looking into, I think. Maybe I'll find other veterans and ask if they're stuck like Kaede, addicted like you said, or...or what. I don't know.

She shrugged a little, looking up with a half smile for Essence.

We don't have to talk about that, though. That's kind of heavy, isn't it?

@Essence